The Legend of Zelda Live Action Trailer

In 2008, a live action movie translation of the Legend of Zelda video game titles was released as a theatrical trailer on the internet. Although it was stated by IGN that the Legend of Zelda trailer was an “elaborate April Fool’s Day prank” I will nevertheless review the footage as if it were legitimate. That being said: I believe I just heard the words “seppuku” muttered through the frustrated lips of Zelda creator Shigeru Miyamoto.
When Miyamoto created Zelda, he wanted players to experience a world of puzzles, action/adventure, and exploration. Miyamoto wanted people to be engaged creatively and strategically. This trailer does none of that. This live action fan orgasm is nothing but an over-budgeted flop that fails to resonate anything of which Miyamoto and Nintendo set out to do when they began the Zelda franchise. The opening sequence of the trailer has a score that harkens to a Garageband loop, and the CGI landscapes lack any of the charm or character of the 2D Gameboy Legend of Zelda game. The video game represents an ominous garden with endless possibilities of exploration; whereas the trailer is very upfront and leaves nothing to the imagination. Ah, imagination. I wish this trailer had some of that. It took me three attempts to get through the entire 3 minute trailer and I am still regretting those lost minutes.
This film takes a step backward in ingenuity. Whoever was the creative mind behind this adaptation has never sat down to actually play the game or read any background on the creation of the franchise. I realize that the trailer is a prank, but I think the filmmakers abilities are a better joke. The editing leaves the actors poor abilities wide open to viewers. The costumes are plastic and rubber messes that look like they were picked up at iParty the day before the shoot. Some of the set pieces are commendable for such a low budget project, but the filmmaker needs to realize that he is no Peter Jackson. Tighter shots equal more believable and enjoyable shots. The score is predictable as is the storyline. Even though everyone that lived through the 80′s knows a little bit of the background to Zelda, give the audience something to look forward to. The game is supposed to be an intricate puzzle, why not design a storyline around that idea? The filmmaker seems to think otherwise and believes that audiences lack the intelligence to fathom such concept and would rather want a storybook fairytale, that if Mother Goose had her way, would never see the light of day. I will not even take the time to give any kind of shout out to the actors because they are all no names that will as a result remain nameless among American moviegoers. The only commendable aspect to this trailer is that it is absolutely hilarious. Comical at the fact that it tries to come off as a real movie that will excite fans.
Although I enjoyed playing many of the Zelda games as a youth, in my young adulthood it seems I will have to repress those joyous moments spent bashing away at the game controller buttons trying to find an ocarina, a sword, or even the princess for this trailer murdered everything I once held dear for Zelda and for young filmmakers who allow draw their inspirations from hacks such as German director Uwe Bolle.